Judgement Day

"You are terminated...."

Blah,forget the Terminator saga for once.It's not the 2nd movie,but it's in fact MY judgement day,and once more,this isn't going to be such a happy post...

Dad called up yesterday,and was talking to mum,while I was eating my lunch.In the middle of it,I heard:"You come back and we'll make a decision."Now,I don't need to be a fool to know what decision is that.You guys might think I'd be glad to have him back after his long hours of work.Unfortunately,because the conversation was within earshot,I've got the answer:NOT REALLY.

I understand that he constantly criticises me for not being good enough.I bet he still doesn't get the point:"Play it because you love it".Here's one of his more frequently used quotes:"Got any points?"

=.= Points?Screw points,you're just p*ssed because you're "investing" and not getting any in return.I'm no puppet.And the word "invest" plainly shows that you're trying to manipulate me,someway,somehow....

Now,I do have points,but not at the national level yet(due to the fact that they take results from best 8 tournaments while I played like 4 so far).However,playing matches=gaining experience.It doesn't mean that you'll get better if you win.Sometimes it's when you lose when you found your greatest triumph.Currently,I've been on a good streak since my 1st tournament win(played Super league yesterday and won both my matches) but honestly I can't wait until I lose(school trials coming up,losing is most likely).Why?I get criticised when I win,I know what I have to work on,and you talk like there's no limit.When I lose,I can hold up my head,think of what was good,what can work,what I have to change,because the truth is that I'm not in Brunei anymore,it's a new ballgame.

Sure,I could hit balls hard like I used to,but here's different.It's a battle of minds,no longer the battle of power.Dad was like:"Whack him left and right,make him run"Now dad,what you were saying is PURE OVERKILL.Sure,you can still insist that you're "one of my coaches".Truth is,what's new that I can learn from you?You have the right principle,but there's others who can open up my mind even further.

Now,I'm not saying I don't need him anymore,but when I was at the Gold Coast,one coach taught me stuff I never knew before.In response to make the opponent run left and right(I said that because that's what I've heard tons of times and I'm practically sick of hearing it),the coach asked:"How are you going to do that?".Now,that I have no answer.It was hard to swallow,but he told me:"You're not playing tennis,you're just hitting tennis balls".

That was a shocker to me,and throughout the next few days he showed me some examples of people in tournaments who play "tennis"."Tennis," he says "is like a chessgame.You think 2 or 3 moves ahead,what you're gonna do,what shot he's gonna make,and how you're gonna win the point.The trick to that is patterns.You use the patterns to set up the play just like you want it to be,and that way you will win the point."

Until now I still have difficulty creating patterns.In fact,I don't even know what pattern did I use.Sure,since I've been here,I know what I've gained and what I've lost.I play more backhands(used to slice a lot,and still do,but mostly to get the guy on the run),more forehands and more volleys.6 months ago,my coach at school noted that I wouldn't even dare to go to the net to finish the point(although I have good groundstrokes).That resulted in me playing an extra ball the opponent hits back as he/she has time to recover(volleying on the other hand shortens recovery time).Now that I'm going to the net more often,I'm more unpredictable(People know me as a complete baseliner and a coward at the net XD).It doesn't matter if I lost the point when I'm at the net,because like my coach says:"They're gonna wonder what you're gonna do next,what ball they're gonna use,which gives them more to think and less to react".

Dad can say that I'm better when I was younger all he wants,but I know now that I'm better than I was,someway.Here the level's higher,and not only I had to step up,but to change.You could go BLAM!BLAM!BLAM!,but you'll get a "HOW DID HE GET THAT??!!" most of the time.You can say I'm more powerful than they are and I should have won the match,but you don't understand my characteristics,my strengths,my weaknesses(though you think you know) nor those I'm playing.

And last but not least,who's playing?I know I should be thankful enough that I still can play,but don't cross the line.There's one,and I'm not surprised if you didn't see it......And by the way,don't use your bad knee as an excuse,because how'd you play table tennis at your construction site?

Ok I shouldn't have written too much because I still have more to say(not tennis..).Oh well,some other day.Tennis trials for Grade 11(*sigh* I'm too young...)are on tomorrow or tuesday(Not gonna whine just because they're older,they're better.I know they are,but the new kid on the block's coming up with a few tricks) which trials for the 1st IV(4 best players in school) are on Wednesday and Friday morning(slim chance,though 2nd IV is most likely where I'll end up,it's up to whether who's having a good day,a bad day or a GREAT day) so yeahhs.Dad's gonna come back on Wednesday morning and I'm not gonna tell him about the trials.He's gonna be like:"How come you aren't in the 1st IV?You can whack these guys down here,show them what you're made of.How come you couldn't??!!" Blah,GET REAL.There's others better than me,so I have to be content with playing catch up to them.I mean,patience,just like you said,no?Look who's not now?